Unworthy

Day after day, i can't help but look around at all the people passing by..it's like one of those movies where i just see my life passing right through but i am sitting down - so still,looking left and right..wondering why..i look at all the beautiful faces around me..girl and guy..and i start to wonder..... i used to have such a confidence in myself that i did not care about anything but my own thoughts and my own actions..i only cared about what's in my heart..but day after day..i all i keep hearing is everyone saying, "you're ugly" to my face..and day after day my heart breaks a little, and my confidence fades..all i am now is a shadow..like a ghost wandering around earth,haunting,but isn't actually seen..even a ghost is better than i am..they are talked about everywhere and people fear them,whereas i,am just transparent like them..nothing more but dust bunnies flying in the air waiting to be swept or blown away....i can't help but look at all the beautiful faces, left and right, guy and girl..everyone more beautiful than i am..all the girls with their long legs and their beautiful curves..i want my confidence back..i want to go home to parents who say they love me instead of saying that i'm fat and ugly..they say i can't make it in the real world because i'm not beautiful..is that true?i'm starting to think that it is..i do not write this because i feel sorry for myself,i write this because i want to release whatever pain i have and hope that God might take away my pain and give me back my courage..i want to feel whole again..like i am worth something..or at least,it that is not possible..i just want my long fringe back,so that i may hide my face and my scars from all the beautiful people..